As I have never attended a Seven Day Amitabha Recitation Retreat (Fo Qi) before, I was encouraged by my supervisor to join the retreat for one day. And I think it was partly due to my good karma to be given this opportunity.

I find it totally different from other retreats which I have attended before; and the first difference was having to put on the ‘hai qing’; the black robe that all lay devotees have to put on during the retreat. For the first time, I learnt how to put on the ‘hai qing’; how to take it off and fold it properly.

During the retreat, no matter how hard I ‘watch over’ my mind, it would still run away towards my work and family. At one point the three defilements that is greed, anger and delusion even arose in me! I quickly controlled and brought my wondering thoughts back to the present by having mindfully recited ‘Amituofo’ and concentrated on my breathing.

Although I could not chant the Amitabha Sutra very well as I find it hard to pronounce the words properly, I contemplated and wholeheartedly recited the Amitabha Buddha’s name.

The most touching of all was observing the senior “pusas” mindfully circumambulating and reciting ‘Amituofo’ mindfully, especially a very senior ‘pusa’ who couldn’t even walk properly anymore. I can’t help shedding tears, observing her and there and then, I made an aspiration to go for more such retreats if possible; and not waste anymore time. Who knows whether if I can live to be as old as her; as life is not permanent at all.

The ‘running’ meditation was certainly a mind opening experience. Running while chanting Amitabha Buddha; Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva; and Mahasthamaprapta Bodhisattva. I was getting tired and very much wanted to pull out; but I told myself that I must go on to the end as this is a retreat and during retreats one must strive on with vigilance and not give up easily. Despite the physical fatigue after the running, I felt very exhilarated after that, even though my muscles ached for three whole days and I couldn’t even climb the stairs fast.

I am very grateful to Venerable Zhen Xin for providing the guidance and providing the Han-yu pin yin (Chinese phonetics) of the suttas. My deep appreciation goes to my supervisor, sister Cheng See for encouraging me to attend this retreat. Without her encouragement, I wouldn’t have known what Fo Qi was all about. And to sister Saw Choo for ‘looking after’ us.

By the power of the merits which I have accumulated thus, may I be able to attend retreats after retreats.

Amituofo.