(an excerpt from an email written by the author to share among friends)

I did not go to dhammaloka, for I was too tired after working, so I decided to have an online dharma night, listening to talks online. I found one of the talks to be so good, as I benefited much from it, I could not help writing it down to share it with all of you. Hopefully you will find it useful as well. (Do make yourself a cup of tea and sit down quietly, as it is going to take quite awhile. Enjoy!)

The talk was about ‘Change the perception of things'.

Perception is the way of the mind, the quality of the mind. Our mind actually chooses to see what it wants to see, and not see the whole reality of the world, the complete full story. Therefore we often misunderstand a lot of aspects about this world and more importantly about ourselves.

There was once an Aborigine (a term for Australian natives) who was approached by a white kid and was told “Sir, you are not black, you are brown!” He then realized, for the first time he was brown, and not black. That comment actually changed his perception of himself. More often than not, we accept half truths which the perception gives to us. Labeling ourselves can be so limiting to our lives. Just imagine how many people in the society have been told that they are intelligent, pretty or stupid, only to continue to live in that perception.

Their perception then becomes solid, a concrete reality which limits them to one way of how they look at things. Our own perceptions easily form a limit in our minds. By changing our way of looking at things in order to survive through challenging environments is what we need to do.

Sometimes, when we are assigned a task that we do not really like, we would think about it; Why me? Why do I have to do this? It is not fair! Actually, it is the thinking which causes the sufferings. The task itself is usually not a problem whatsoever. Doing the task would be much easier than thinking about it. We have a choice of complaining about it or just doing it. What does this slogan “Just do it!” (a Nike slogan) remind us of? Do not think about it. If we believe that we are controlled by this stereotype world, how frustrating our lives would be! We should gain control over our own lives, but how? Through our minds!

Our mind is a very powerful thing. All those uncomfortable feeling and pain in our body; how much are caused by fear and worry? How much are caused by the reality of an illness? In the experience of the nurses who have visited the monastery, as soon as the cancer is diagnosed, it spreads wildly even though the cancer has been sitting there for months or years without problems. It is the stress that comes from worrying and thinking which makes the illness worse.

The perceptions and thoughts that we have no control over will actually create terrible sicknesses in our body. If we know how to use perception and thoughts, we can turn it the other way round.

A famous experiment conducted through hypnosis some years ago yielded an amazing discovery on the power of MIND. A man who had been hypnotized was told that he would be scalded with a red hot rod. (The rod was actually set to room temperature.) When the rod touched him, he yelled with pain and most amazingly a blister appeared! How did that happened? The power of the MIND! It created the blister. Hypnosis is a strong belief of something told by a hypnotist. What you are told will make you believe in it without any doubt whatsoever.

By understanding the limitations of perception, whatever comes to our mind, we can stop it and not place too much value on it. We should instead create alternatives, other possibilities of looking at things. This is the cultivation of the mind, so that we would be a better person, and be free from our own limitations set by our minds. It is indeed wonderful that once if were to make a mistake, by acknowledging and accepting it, the problem would disappear!

Each and every on of us have so much accumulated karma in the past and new seedlings of karma in the future. We should not need to keep thinking about what will happen in the future. Stay still in the present moment, because the present is still an unfinished business. We always tend to get things done, such as ‘I want to finish this work and go for a holiday!' and ‘I want to finish this holiday and get back to work!' These are unfinished things. We have always gotten a wrong understanding of the whole process of life, that life is continuous. How many times in life have we tried to settle our things but we could never manage to do so? We cannot change our sufferings by altering to outside circumstances.

Most people are working hard to get close to retirement, for they believe that once they are retired, they will have less suffering. Most of our lives, we would always think that if I do not have to do anything, I will be happier. This is not the proper way to think. We should instead think that if I get this, I will be happy; if I do this, I will be happy; if I finish my studies, I will be happy. This way of life is much more practical than continuously praying for something undone.

Some years ago, two Thai sisters came to the monastery to talk to Ajahn Brahmavamso. One was complaining about the bad relationship with her husband, and the other one was longing to get a partner whom she can share her life with. They were listening to themselves and not to each other. Ajahn said he actually saw a deal then and there! This was what he told them:

Whether you are single or married, you would still have suffering. If you are single and you want to get a partner, you are just changing the suffering from one type to another. That is not the proper way of getting rid of suffering. Not to change from one suffering to another suffering is a wise man's thinking.

Happiness is doing the washing; happiness is going to work on Mondays. If you do not find happiness in what you are always doing, where and when will you find happiness? Will you find happiness in something which you rarely do? If you hardly do it, how confident are you that you would be happy?

LOVE....Love is the way a certain person makes you feel, not the person that you love. If you truly love a person, your whole life is devoted to make that person happy. So, you should also be happy if that person ran away with your best friend because he/she is happier with your best friend than with you! How many of us truly love our partners, or do we just like the way our partner makes us feel? If we did not feel love, why should we be sad and filled with emptiness when they are gone? Do we actually miss the person, or the feelings which they caused us to feel within us? Think about it!

A lot of people have been asking this question; when will the universe end? According to the Buddha, the end of the universe is the end of all sufferings. It is not out there, but in here, in this body, in this MIND. We should not change the life out there, but the life in here, in the MIND

Basically, it means:

1) Just do it! Do not think too much about it!

2) Our own perceptions limit us to the way of looking at things, so we should play around with it.

3) Life is a continuous process; stay still with the present moment.

4) Our minds are the forerunners of all states.

5) Do not change life out there, but change life in our MINDs.

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About the Author

Vivien Tai currently resides in Perth , Australia as she is undergoing a second year undergraduate course in psychology at the University of Western Australia . She also holds a major in economics from University Putra Malaysia (UPM). As a student in UPM, she was selected to be in the intervarsity community service program which was organized by Young Buddhist Association of Malaysia (YBAM). The program was held for three consecutive years in Machap Umboo, a village in Melaka. Through this program, Vivien underwent a tremendous experience which changed her perception towards life. After completing her studies in UPM, she began working in a small insurance agency for a big multinational corporation. Eventually, she realized her dream of studying abroad when she applied for a master course in marketing from the current university which she is studying. Though beset with financial difficulties at first, she was able to study her way through funds accumulated from her hard earned money.

However, Buddhism began to have a strong influence on her, and she decided to pursue a more humanistic way of life, by choosing to start new course in psychology. This decision is also part of her desire to do a more humanistic work in the future. She was also part of the volunteer training program which was organized by Tham Wah Wan, the Than Hsiang Kuala Lumpur Branch. For her, it was an excellent training program and she was much inspired by it. The program had strengthened her determination to fulfill the best in life at the moment when she was thinking of withdrawing. Vivien is very thankful to her family for their unconditional support as she paves her way of learning on the road of the Buddha Dharma.